I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I've been ignoring his texts cause last night I put him in my phone as 'ignore for atleast a day' and I trust my drunk self.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
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