You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Randomize
