the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
Randomize
