Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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