Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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