Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Drunk enough that you donated $50 to taco bell, because they serve a great purpose.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
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