just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
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