She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Randomize
