Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
just woke up to a get well card i wrote myself when i was drunk. it was by the advil. i am a cocky bitch.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
Randomize
