Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
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