I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
The night went downhill when he lit her purse on fire and tried putting it out with vodka
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
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