He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
Sometimes you just have to have sex for a Netflix password.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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