The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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