Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Randomize
