Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
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