So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize
