also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
