his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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