My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize