Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
Honestly, this social distancing bullshit is giving me a good excuse for drinking alone.
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