What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
