There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
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