we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Remember that time you bought snap bracelets on Amazon and they sent you 300 pregnancy tests instead? Amazon knows.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
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