apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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