it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Randomize
