i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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