Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
so I'm coping with getting the "I'm not over my ex" bomb dropped on me by getting drunk and yelling at people while wearing a purple princess hat
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
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