I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Randomize