My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
thus making me awesome and them whores
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Major win last night. I traded my roommate two cigs for a six pack and a bag of beef jerky. This has been a Brian weekend update
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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