She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Randomize
