I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
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