I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Randomize