wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
Randomize
