Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Randomize
