I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
