Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
You know when the three of us hug it out in the alcohol isle in walmart it's gonna be fun.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
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