sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
I need to calm my uterus...
Never underestimate the power of titties
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
