i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
