WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
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