Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
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