I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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