My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
My hands are stained pink. I look like I fisted a muppet.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize