I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I lost the right to judge tonight
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
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