if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
Randomize
