does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Randomize