The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Randomize
