I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Randomize
