do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize