i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
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