I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
false alarm. still invincible.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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