he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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